I've had a few conversations lately, mayhaps for some time now that I think about it, that have lead me to believe

I am completely incapable of getting my point across.

And who knows, this might be another, here it goes. At work, at home it doesnt matter where, there's a conversation going on, I might even be a part of it, but at some point I bring up a point, an observation something I feel will add to the line of thought. and I will present it in what I feel is a confident and clear manner. But it instantly INSTANTLY! gets shot down, or other points that were already brought up will be reiterated. The worst part is when I'm given the cliff notes of the conversation so far, as if I were an idiot.

I even stated as much in one instance telling them

"I could tell you the sky is blue and you'd find fault with that."

They didn't get it.

Of late I've taken up the hobby of picturing myself standing behind the speaker saying such things as

"I'd give you my opinion but you've already showed me what it means to you."

Of course my habit of turning things around and pointing them at myself kicks in and I wonder at what point I should seek therapy .... pity too, you'd think friends would try to understand.... mayhaps I should return the favor.

I see your online! I'd say hi but I know you wont answer, I've been ignored much too often to want to do that again. Oh for the days when I'd rush to reply to your call. Doing this now only makes me into a smitten puppy it seems. A nuisance to you. Something you now look down upon .. at least thats the feeling I get... I have no idea how you feel. And I'm not sure I want to realy. To have some one who's oppinion and view I admired and looked up to tell me I'm a dissapointment, ugly, a waste of time ... no, no one would want that.... but here's the thing ... you made me into this ....

I've come to the discovery that facebooks biggest product (albeit unintentional, mayhaps) is the ability to let others know how much fun others are having. Or how much fun is going on without them. Which is where I'm at. ... if my train of thought is correct (that would be a first, granted) then the greatest threat to social media sites is social media sites ....

An odd day indeed!Got to work early to do a taping in the main hospital, only to discover the area was in a blackout. The hospital of course had generators and was working business as usual. And therefore so was I. The shoot went well and I was able to get back to the office a few hours later ... the empty ... lit office. Limited power had returned and I found myself alone there again. I do this alot. While the lights were back the networks were still down and the phones system being a part of that were out too. So I was left with no alternative but to go home ... :-)

As I was riding my bike off post I stopped to watch the flag being lowered. at the end the formation marched up to the Officer of the day and presented the flag. As this was going on a young woman came out the doors to the hospital pulling a child's wagon in which lay a baby no more than 1 or 2. Alongside the wagon there was an IV stand attached. She walked to the edge of the driveway and paused to lift the wagon over the bump. A man on the cleaning crew nearby put down his chores and helped her.

What acts of kindness have you seen today?

Again and again goodbye

Today I helped tape the last Easter Sunrise service at Walter Reed.

... The Last.

The last few years I was in the service I would look at everyday occurrences and note that then might be the last time these common events might happen, and ultimately, I was eventually correct. No longer strolling to the courtyard during lunch. Admiring the view (a joke of course, the view out the windows at the Pentagon shows more dirty windows held in place with crumbling concrete). Walking through the shops on the concourse. Gone soon.

With this thought haunting me, I watched as the crew broke down the equipment.

I've been here before.

In youth we have little past, and so look forward

... but with age comes many more goodbyes.