http://www.epilogue.net/cgi/database/art/list.pl?gallery=15227
Moving away from home and being out on my own has made me realize I've cut many connections with others. recently I've tried to create new connections, friendships, memories. I had an idea for a simple exerciser and needed help making a prototype, since I dont have my garage. I asked a friend and my son to take it up with me. I sent pictures and described it to them. They accepted the challenge with little enthusiasm and went on theier way. My inquiries were always "sorry, very busy", "next weekend" ... Another attempt I became more assertive and had them help me do interviews for a future podcast. while they did help, after the event they seemed to disappear, giving the same responses when asked to help complete the project. Thinking I was going about it all wrong I inquired what they were up to. Which they were glad to share. I told them I wanted to help and would be ready for whatever assistance they might need.
The promised requests never materialized.
The bottom line is that while they are very friendly to me and we seem to have fun when we're together,
..... I'm not some one they want to reach out to.
I would love to find out where I fail as a friend, but honestly, how do you bring that up in a conversation. And where would such a conversation lead ? I would truly love to say that this was only with a few, but truthfully, this has been a common occurrence in my life.
Had I known when I was a little boy,
in a crowded house with brother and sisters who liked to tease,
that that wish to be left alone would come true ...
I'd have wished for a friend
